


Expensive Champagne And French Cheese

by LateStarter58



Series: The Booze and Nosh Club: the Tom and Sarah Stories [3]
Category: British Actor RPF, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: Cheese, F/M, Food, Food Porn, French Cheeses - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 03:05:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17051882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LateStarter58/pseuds/LateStarter58
Summary: “How can anyone be expected to govern a country with 365 cheeses?”General Charles de Gaulle“I’m also a fan of very expensive champagne and French cheese, but nobody ever writes about that…”Tom Hiddleston





	Expensive Champagne And French Cheese

I’ll start with the _Laguiole_. It’s one of my favourites. It’s like you: strong, smooth, very tasty… and useful, always welcome; multi-talented… Firm, too. It’s good _in_ things – _bed, suits… me –_ and I usually have some around.

Ah.

That’s where it’s _not_ like you, then. Because you are usually somewhere else. Doesn’t seem to matter where. Just not _here_.

So, back to the _fromage_. When you come back, I’ll make you some cheese on toast with it, or melt it into a jacket potato, or I can rustle up that sinful pasta recipe you love so much, or a lasagne…

_Could you stay a little longer this time?_

Now, I know you love the softer Normandy ones. Like _Pont-L’Evêque._ That reminds me of you, too: a crust on the outside, hiding a soft centre, just waiting to be discovered. A bit square, but that’s OK, I love it that way. Classic; _classy_. Mature, sometimes; other times fresh and a little raw… with a lingering sweetness and leaving a memory that abides.

_Oh yes, that’s you, all right._

But I must not be selfish. I have to share, I know. I get it.

This next one’s more like me than you: _Roquefort._ Old-fashioned (goes back to Roman times, _Classics-boy_. Bet you knew it’s mentioned by Pliny, since you’re such a fucking BOFF). Sharp, salty, with a ‘ _in your face, this is me and tough if it doesn’t suit you_ ’ flavour. But you can be like that too, here; with me. And I like that guy. I like all of the yous, and I’d be happy to spend time with any of them. Any time that you can spare for me.

_I’d love to lick some sharp, salty Roquefort off you, by the way._

_Don’t mind where from_

This next one… oh, that’s you to a ‘t’…

Wait, though. First I need to open this bottle. You weren’t saving it, I hope..? I just think that expensive champagne is the _only thing_ to drink with French cheese, right, darling?

Now, where was I? Oh yes, _Pouligny-Saint-Pierre._ AKA ‘the Eiffel Tower’. Tall, needs time to, er, ‘ripen’… Made from some good old goat.

_What?_

Oh, don’t give me _that_ , you have your moments…

What does my little book say about this one? Oh yes, ‘the exquisite sourness spreads in the mouth, followed by a salty taste, and then sweetness…’

_Oh god_

_How long until you’re here, darling?_

My, my, this _shampoo_ is yummy! Cuts through the creaminess wonderfully…

 

Now, let’s go up into the Alps for the next one: _Tomme de Savois._ What qualities does this one share with you, my love? Ah yes: low in fat, can be a little sticky in texture, but usually firm…and a softer, gentler taste than might be anticipated…

_I miss you, Cheese-boy. Quite a lot_

Just a mo, let me get the bottle. I need it for this last one: _Langres._ You remember; it’s the little round wrinkly one with the dimple. From Champagne. You’re supposed to pour _Marc de champagne_ into that hollow, but I’ll manage with the actual fizz tonight.

_What’s that? How long? Just an hour, you say?_

In that case I’ll wait and pour it into your little hollow, darling.

_You make an excellent cheeseboard._


End file.
